who do you think you are, running around leaving scars

These two pictures makes me yearn for summer. Flowers and handpicked strawberries from my garden. Today I'm really exhausted. Like, I had my break way past the time I usually have it. Mainly because they had a carnival at the nursing home, and we were only one (plus me) at my team, when we're usually two plus two students (me and my fellow student). So when I finally managed to sit down in order to eat, I realised I had to bring a patient down to the physiotherapist. And when I came back upstairs, the other patients had finished their lunches, so I had to help them to their rooms and the loo, before I finally managed to sit down and eat the rest of my food. But you know, the carnival was really funny, because they were serving alcoholic beverage and there were people dancing with funny masks and hats. I spent most of my time chatting with an old man who has dementia. Nevertheless, it was a very funny experience. The past few days I've been listening to the Up All Night album by One Direction, because my dashboard on Tumblr was spammed with audio posts from the album. And when I heard Everything About You, the memories just came rushing back, and I was reminiscing. It's odd, because in my head I see a specific "scene" to each song that was played at the concerts last year. Like, when I listen to Stand Up, I always think of this little Ziall dance (I'll link to it here - it's at 1:12). I cannot wait for the THM tour to start. I've really missed watching new videos of One Direction each day. Anyways, I think I'm going to take an early night with a bit of fan fiction first. I've stopped reading angst, because I found that I got really depressed by reading those. And although I enjoy a good cry, I don't like walking around with depressing thoughts over an extent of time. So now I'm mostly reading funny fan fiction. And mostly of them are about 30k words, which takes quite a while to read. And I who decided to not start reading the Lord of The Rings until summer, because it's so damn long. I can't imagine how many pages of fan fiction I've read. If only I was that pumped to read Lord of The Rings too.

Remember this jumper? Well, here's a fun fact: all of Niall's jumpers are from Asos. -- Well, not really. But 90% of them are. And now I just want to buy them all. Well, actually, as I've admitted to earlier, I kind of love men's fashion. Especially jumpers and t-shirts. So I kind of want all of the jumpers from the Asos men selection. Too bad I'm completely broke. 

What if you wake up one day, and you're 67. And you think "where did the days go?". That's my biggest fear, you know. Time escaping me before I realise. Doing things in routines make the days pass in a blink of an eye. -- When I was younger I used to wish to be a grown up. And I always thought the days were long. Maybe it's because we'd always run around outside, climbing trees, playing different games each day. But now the days are gone within what seems like a few hours. From the hour your eyes blink open, to your eyes close - it sometimes feels like an hour only. And then you have these sayings like "you don't remember days, you remember memories". It freaks me out, makes me think that maybe I shouldn't be sitting here right now. That maybe I should be sitting around a fire in the woods with my friends. And I know that sounds very peculiar, because I'm pretty sure none of my friends would actually want that. You know why I would even wish for a driving licence? So I could wake up at 4:00 am, toss a few things in the car and drive over to my friends' and collect them, and just drive somewhere. Tomorrow I'll wake up too early for my liking, and I'll take the bus in the dark. And I'll be at the nursing home for seven hours, before I go home for a meal. And then I'll go to bed before it's too late. Before I know it, my eyes flutter open again, at the sound of my phone vibrating beside me. And it goes on like that. Forever. I don't know.. why does all games have more lives, more chances? When you play Mario Kart, you can start over all the time. Game over should mean game over. Why bother with the false pretenses? It's not like we have 7 lives in reality. I'm too young for all these thoughts.

walk away until you're not standing at my door

Hiya. I woke up today, and I realised I'd forgotten to deliver a paper due yesterday. Probably because I was in bed all day yesterday. 'S not a joke even. I had a bit of thinking when I went to bed to summarize the day, and I realised I'd actually been lying in bed throughout most of the day (except when going to the loo, when eating, and when showering). I've been listening to Little Mix this weekend, especially Turn Your Face. And it's really lovely, except I'm a bit disappointed that they don't sing together at the chorus. And I've noticed it's the same with a lot of their other songs too. And that's sort of what stops me from being a "mixer" - it just doesn't feel like they are a group when they've just got their own parts in a song. Not saying they're not a good group though, because they have great chemistry together. And I do like their music. Also, I'm very fond of their style, because they remind me of a 90's group. I mean, just google Little Mix, and look at the pictures. I was roaming through my bedroom for a bit, and I've realised that over the years I've been collecting sentimental things that I'll take with me to any future abodes. This little case for toothpicks are on of them. I got it from my cousin from China, after she and my siblings had been travelling through China. For now it's my holder for buttons. I've not been lying in my bed all day today. Mainly because I keep thinking that I need to do some school work. And then I turn my computer on, and it's just so easy to not open a Word document and start typing in words about nursing. It's so much easier to listen to Nick Grimshaw on the BBC breakfast show whilst reading fan fiction. Also, I'm writing on my AU (alternative universe) story about my life, and I've just asked my best friend what she wants her boyfriend/husband to be working as in it. You know, because it's so usual for people to outright say to you "hey, I'm writing this AU story about myself and you're in it. Now, do you want to be married at 26? If so, what does your husband do for a living?". My best friend must be very understanding, as she only asked what AU stands for, before she continued to answer my questions. Oh well, I've got tomorrow for regrets and slapping myself for avoiding school work. 

happy birthday harry

Oh wee, it's February 1st! Happy 19th birthday darling. And thank you Ed, for addressing this topic. You are a top lad and friend (and a musician of course). I think most of the time Harry just get bashed for everything he does, and media wants to shape him into the new "bad guy", when he really is one of the sweetest people on this earth. And it's a bit unfair that a 19 year old guy needs to deal with these kind of things. Even if they are very lucky to be in the position they are in. I'm just saying, that it's not so weird that the world is screwed up when you find articles about Harry having back acne, instead of what Ed addresses. I mean, it would be fine if it's actual constructive criticism, because people are entitled to have opinions. I did finish my log yesterday, although in a hurry because I didn't want to write on it today too. And therefore the quality of it is quite lacking, but I can't really be bothered. The weather outside is delightful, but I'm not planning on stepping a foot outside the house today. I've got three fan fictions with over 20k words waiting for me to be read. Before I go, I'm going to link to a tweet by Nialler that sort of testimonies why I love Narry so much.