the intouchables

I sometimes feel a bit weird. It is like I'm in a state of mind between happy and sad. Like I'm indifferent. Sometimes people disappoint you. And that's alright, because it's people. But when those people are significant, it's not that alright anymore. Because you have these high expectations for those people. Like they aren't supposed to disappoint, they are supposed to be perfect. They are supposed to stay your role models. Nothing else. But then they aren't like that. They aren't unbreakable. And everything feels like such a lie. A big fat lie. And it feels like someone shattered a mirror into a million pieces. But then you have to remember that they too are human. And human equals mistakes. You either believe in the good in people, or the bad. It is your choice to be happy. You are the one who decides whether to be negative or positive. But that doesn't mean that you are never allowed to be unhappy. You must feel unhappy at times. It's only natural.

Because of some stupid reasons, I really wanted to cry today. Just to release some endorphin. Hence why I went to watch The Intouchables at the cinema. I was quite surprised to see (or listen I suppose) Ludovico Einaudi, the composer, during quite a bit of the movie. Einaudi along with Marianelli are my favorite composers (thus far). It made me even more excited for the movie, if that is even possible, as I was quite excited to watch it. It's been on my list to watch for quite awhile. A year or so, I think. But it's never been premiered at the cinemas until now. And I've always had this expectation to French movies being "the good ones". I'm not quite sure why, but it's just something that has settled in my mind, I suppose. And yes, I did very much enjoy this movie. It was a bit weird though, because at the ending I was a bit disappointed because it didn't end up like I had thought. But then again, I was worried before watching it, that everything would be predictable. But it wasn't, and that's a good thing. And that's when I realised that I kind of loved it. I had expected to cry loads, but in honesty, I laughed more. And that's one of the surprises - it's actually very hilarious. But I did cry too, because it's just very touching. And I found it very funny how relevant this movie is to my nursing education. And I had just attended a lecture about phantom pains prior to watching this movie. Which was also something that was brought up in it. It is a very very nice movie, that I think everyone should watch really. And I am very glad I chose the "french movie" rather than the new Twilight movie.

On our way to the train station, I had to stop in order to take some pictures, because they've started decorating for Christmas everywhere. And it was so incredibly perfect, standing there beneath the Christmas lights, and then you could hear bells chime in the background. If only it had begun snowing. I do prefer Oslo at night. It's just a whole other atmosphere. I'm sorry for being a bit vague today, but it is what it is. And I'm not being sad and happy at the same time like Charlie (Perks of Being a Wallflower). No, it's just this weird indifference. But enough with trying to put words to emotions. I think I'm actually going to watch Grey's Anatomy now. And possibly cry a bit more. And don't worry. As I wrote, I relish in sadness. To be honest, it might be the emotion I am most comfortable with.