all the scrapes on our knees will tell you where we've been, where we have bled

Dagene mine består av å lese, lese og atter mer lesing. Det er nesten så jeg knapt husker noe annet som har skjedd den siste måneden. Det bekymrer meg litt, tanken på at alle dager går i ett, at jeg kanskje ikke utnytter livet mitt til det fulle. Jeg har på følelsen av at jeg kanskje burde vært på en bar på en lørdagskveld i stedet for å sitte i sofaen og se på X Factor. Samtidig tror jeg at hvis jeg virkelig hadde ønsket det, så hadde jeg gjort det. Jeg synes det er feil å tenke at man alltid skal gjøre noe spennende i livet dersom man ikke ønsker det. Gjør det som gjør deg lykkelig, det er alltid ett fint motto. Men det er jo også et fryktelig ukomplisert motto som ikke alltid passer livet som er langt fra ukomplisert. Selv om mine dager stort sett går til lesing, så kan jeg ikke klage. Mitt nye hjem er innerst i kantina på skolen, der jeg tilbringer mange(!) timer med medstudentene mine. Og selv om jeg vet at jeg har en veldig viktig eksamen om akkurat fire uker, så er min livskvalitet på topp. Dette er en av de siste stundene mine som sykepleiestudent, og jeg akter å nyte de så mye jeg kan. For jeg vet at dagen jeg er ferdig med disse studiene, da kommer jeg til å savne disse lange dagene fylt med latter og noe som likner delir. I dag var et prakteksemplar av disse dagene. Hodet mitt var i ferd med å briste av informasjon da jeg forsøkte å forstå renin-angiotensin-aldosteron systemet, også kjent som RAAS. Jeg måtte ta en pause tilslutt, da det føltes ut som om jeg skulle besvime. Men det skyldtes vel mer at jeg ikke hadde spist noe særlig. Dette i tillegg til andre faktorer gjorde at denne dagen ble spesielt emosjonell. Jeg (eller vi) var på randen til å felle et par tårer opptil flere ganger. Kanskje jeg bare er sliten. Jeg tror at jeg må ta en pause nå, felle et par tårer. Også skal jeg pugge til framlegg. #livetsomstudent (for dere som liker gode sitater, så burde dere lese igjennom noen av disse av Neil Gaiman) 

we're all just searching for something bigger than we're all able to find

Did you know that our moon is a natural satellite, which is a celestial body that orbits another body. For example a planet. "Europe" is known as a continent, but it's also the name of another natural satellite for the planet Jupiter. And Jupiter has loads of natural satellites, like Io, which is so gorgeous. Or Callisto, also a natural satellite for Jupiter-- it's lovely looking. The universe is so big (meaning bigger than you can ever imagine, and it's expanding every millisecond), and there's so many things that are unknown to us. And every thing we do know today, might even be incorrect. Because there is the chance that we might have just discovered a tiny truth within the whole truth. It's both exiting and terrifying. I've been reading much too many fan fictions about the universe, cosmos, galaxies, planets, and more. So now I've been reading astronomy and whatnot, which was the sole reason for my trip to the library yesterday. "Even if you find it difficult to let go of your fear of being judged, this is a great opportunity to stretch outside of your comfort zone. Nothing ventured, nothing gained". This is a piece of my horoscope for today, and it's still frighteningly accurate. I asked the boss at my "praksis" about the possibilities of a future job, and well, it went well. She basically told me that once I've got my driver licence, I just have to give her a call, and I'll have a job. I felt like I took a big step into adulthood, though what I did was really just a minor thing that people do every day. Nevertheless, it felt like stepping into adulthood, to actually pursue the things I want. Is that odd? There's so many things that I've wanted throughout my two decades on this earth (well, actually, who knows how long I've existed? Because the human body mass is essentially elements from the periodic table, and every element in the periodic table, aside from hydrogen, is essentially star dust. Ergo, we are all made of stardust), and I can't really remember pursuing them. And I found myself thinking: oh, when I've got a licence, a job and eventually an apartment-- what will I do next? What will the next goals be? Christ, I've been here for two decades, if not more, and it feels like I've just been born. Like someone kicked me out of the womb for the universe to devour. Well, this is getting far too serious and philosophical for my enjoyment. Next Friday I'm off to Aalesund to celebrate my nephew becoming two years old. Might meet some new babies too, as there seems to be new babies all the time in my little home town. Or, well, maybe home island is more proper? And I can't wait to have him in my arms. You'd think I've got babies on my mind, which, I guess I sort of do. I've actually got no plans for the rest of the day. Like, there's not a thing I have to do, and it's so lovely. Well, except the birthday card I'm making for my nurse supervisor. Yep, that's how fond I am of her. In other news, I think I might have developed a girl crush on Harry Styles' sister. It's just that she's so smart and sassy, and just impressive in general. Does that even count as a girl crush, or is that just called "an idol"? Yeah, probably the latter. Imagine me walking up to Harry Styles , asking him to ask his sister to follow me on Twitter. That would be a laugh. I had the weirdest dream last night. And I've had it before-- it's like I'm on a task to walk to some place in order to take pictures (of course my dreams include photography), and last time I had this dream I walked past a property which had a little panda toy hanging in the tree as well as other panda toys in the windows. This time, however, I decided to walk inside the house rather than passing it. Just in order to take pictures of all the various panda ornaments, and lastly the panda toy hanging on the tree in the garden. That's when the owner of the property came running outside with a folded newspaper, yelling "get off my property". I-- that dream definitely places in my top 10 weirdest dreams. Oh well, have a nice Wednesday evening.