I'm the voice inside your head you refuse to hear. I'm the face that you have to face, mirrored in your stare

I am still a bit upset about Zayn leaving One Direction, and I probably will for a long time. I just can't listen to a song of theirs without flinching and quickly changing the song. Because I wanted to release emotions and look back at the good ol' days, I watched This Is Us yesterday. It was a good decision, because though I was sad, it also made me happy. It reminded me of how much joy this band has brought me. Now I'm looking forward to the times all of them will be gathered, because I've always been a fan of their friendship before anything else. It's quite amazing to see how much a person from this band can affect the world this much. There were a lot of nice and supportive tweets from different celebrities. It's not a new thing; someone leaving a band. And in some way I'm lucky that I've been in so many fandoms and experienced splits and whatnot, so I'm not crushed. Today was a very tiring day. I'd expected loads of rain, but when I woke up, all I could see was snow. On the bright side, I got to wear my coat. On the not-so bright side, I almost turned into a snow man whilst waiting for the bus. I genuinely ended up with a lump of snow behind my ear, because it was snowing in that direction. My train had to drive another route due to traffic and we stopped quite often due to lack of signal and stuff. But I have to admit that despite it taking me 40 minutes longer to get to school due to the long train ride, it was quite nice. And my usual route is through tunnels, which means you can't see anything. But then I had to walk in the snow again, and I got a snow-shower as I call it. Drenched in melting snow, I escaped to the toilets the moment I arrived at school. Kiwi, Marble and I had initially planned to have an easter brekkie together, but it was very delayed, and Marble couldn't make it due to the weather. I brought two boiled eggs, one for me and one for Kiwi. My belieber friend looked at me in horror as I was eating bread with something else than cheese and ham. I had my first guidance? meeting with my teacher today, and it was a bit like I expected. Thus far my thesis has been something distant. It's just been this paper that I have to finish, but nothing more than that. Today was a bit like a reality-check as my belieber friend so nicely put it. I just realised just how much work it is, and that I have to get cracking. I thought to myself on the way home today (which took me 50 minutes longer than usual) that it's a good thing a mormon said a prayer about my thesis. Yes, that happened. Marble, Kiwi and my belieber friend were almost aghast when I told them about my scheduled meeting with the mormons yesterday. When I left them at our favourite table in the school canteen to meet up with the mormons, they basically treated me like a child who was about to get kidnapped. I followed my gut, and it ended up being a nice meeting though I'm not going to become a mormon in the nearest future. Marble said: "you're just a naturally curious person". I guess I am. I'm really hoping the traffic will be alright tomorrow, because you know I have anxiety about missing my plane. Agh. Right now I have to have a shower, pack and print out some research articles. The latter sounds so much fun! I am bringing my laptop when travelling, because I am going to try to get some work done. However, I'm not so sure how much blogging there will be? Have a good Easter holiday.