This is not the sound of a new man or crispy realization. It's the sound of the unlocking and the lift away

Stod opp tidlig i dag. Jeg forsøker å komme meg i rutine slik at overgangen til jobb ikke blir ekstra vanskelig. Dessuten synes jeg egentlig at det er deilig å stå opp litt tidlig, utnytte dagen. Det er fint når verden virker stille. "Blir ikke noe gåtur på meg i morgen," kommenterte Marble i går. Jeg sa meg enig, dog jeg tullet med "åh, vi skal ikke gå opp Holmenkollen altså?". Det får bli en annen dag. Jeg våknet med en litt sår kropp. Vi tok jo push-ups på gresset i går, 12 x 3. Som nevnt tidligere har jeg omtrent 0% overkroppsmuskulatur. Og det kjente jeg i dag. Det er som om overkroppen har fått et par slag. På kvelden i går satt jeg og så på bilder av Niall (Horan, hvem ellers) i smoking (jeg nistirret på dette bildet og lurte på hva jeg gjør med livet mitt). I dag sprader han rundt på moteshow (yay LMC), tar undergrunnen i London by. De siste ukene har han spilt mye golf og vært med på en fotballkamp for veldedighet. Smokingen gikk han med i et arrangement relatert til veldedighet. Jeg er så fascinert av ham, for han har virkelig utnyttet denne pausen. Han dro jo søren meg på backpacking (fortsatt irritert på ham fordi han reiste hjem før jeg reiste til Asia) i Asia, åpnet faktisk et musikkstudio og driver egen golf business. Jeg derimot, er endelig ferdig med Indochina-dagboken, fem uker etter hjemkomst. Siste innlegget var faktisk rundt 11.000 ord. Det er vel størrelsen av bacheloroppgaven min det. Mens Niall Horan gjør alt det han driver med, så kan jeg gi meg en klapp på skulderen synes jeg. Huff, kjente jeg var lei av å redigere. Ble kanskje ikke gåtur i dag, men trening ble det likevel, selv om det begynte å bli så sent at jeg heller ville legge meg i sengen. Alt gjorde litt ekstra vondt i dag, men gjorde stretching som ble til avslapning på yogamatten på slutten. Apropos yoga og målet mitt om å stå på hendene. Innsett at det nærmest blir umulig om jeg ikke får noe overkroppsmuskler. Så det er førsteprioriteten nå. Jeg fikk blemme av å gå så mye de siste dagene, og vannblemmen er plassert under foten. Den har ikke vært veldig plagsom, men den er såpass plagsom at jeg alltids vet den er der. Så i dag valgte jeg å stikke hull og tømme den. Jeg bare så for meg å skulle stå på den under Little Mix konsert, eller verre; jobb neste uke. Uansett, nå må jeg løpe og pusse tennene. Har mål om å stå opp tidlig(ere) i morgen også. 

this is pouring rain, this is paralyzed

I woke up to the sound of rain this morning, went to relieve my bladder before I went to sleep again. The alarm went at 8:30 am, but I stayed in bed chilling just because I could. It feels very much like autumn, because it's getting colder and the rain seems never ending. The tree outside my window is still mostly green though. Only a few patches of yellow. I did half of the things I wanted to finish yesterday. But you know, I'm always falling behind these days. I thought that I had finally finished my disposable camera, but I've still got one or two shots? I can't wait to put the images in my new photo album from Muji. Yesterday as I was going to school, there were a lot of people who smiled at me. I find that very unusual, and I was paranoid that I had something on my face. But I think the real reason behind it, is that I've taken an effort to try smile at people, or at least look at people. It is an effort, seeing as I don't really enjoy engaging in eye contact with people. Oh well. I've got work today, which isn't very tempting today, seeing as I'd rather spend my time reading as lame as that sounds. But I think it'll be nice to see my patients again, see how they're all doing. Maybe it'll bring me a bit of peace, as my body and brain seems to run on overdrive these days. Onto another subject-- I had a dream of trying to save a person from getting sucked into quicksand (though it's not really how it works), then getting sucked into it myself. I also dreamed about going out on the town with some very old friends from my childhood, and it was really fun! It's raining heavily again now, so I've decided to open the window and listen to some Bon Iver. How very typical. I am going to finish writing notes for school, and then I have to start getting ready for work soon. Have a nice Saturday! 

your love will be safe with me

Morning! At 10:00 pm yesterday, I knocked on my sister's door to get her to look at the clouded sky. I thought it looked gorgeous, like a painting. It was obvious that there was a storm coming our way. We decided to go out on the balcony to watch the storm transform. Both my sister and I quite enjoy the atmosphere thunder and lightning gives. And lately there's been a few of these days with thunder and lightning, so my sister read up on what the different colours of lightning means. So yesterday, as we were watching the lightning in the rain with out raincoats and wellies on along with a cup of hot chocolate in our hands-- we were discussing the colours of the lightning. It was admittedly not the easiest thing to stand there drinking hot chocolate. The rain kept dropping into my cup with such a fast speed, that the hot chocolate kept splashing my face. So eventually I gave up on that, and put my cup inside. We stood outside for 40 minutes, I think. And the last lightning I saw was so up close and so clear on the sky. It was an amazing (and terrifying) red struck of lightning. By then the clouds have moved, and my sister said we were in the midst of the storm, and the lightening was heading our way. I looked nervously at one of the tall trees by our house and tried to figure out how we'd survive if it was struck with lightning. When we decided to head inside, we boiled some tea to warm us up. All in all, it was a really nice thing to do. I can only think of Monchita who would enjoy such a thing, like last year when she told me to wake up early and go outside to see the sunrise. I've yet to do that this year, and maybe I'll do it next weekend, which I actually have off from work. I've not had an entire weekend off since I started my summer job, so that'll be lovely. I woke up at 8:00 am today, and I've just been a bit stressed out about all the things I want to do within today. It is strange when I'd rather read curriculum than the book I'm currently trying to finish. Well, maybe not currently-- I've been trying to finish it for months. I'm almost halfway through, and hopefully I'll manage to finish it today. I also have to start reading up about Dublin, because it's less than three weeks until I go. Which also means I've only got two weeks left of work. I have today off, and I think we're going to have a picnic in our garden, just because. My sister said she wanted to make peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches, which doesn't sound too appealing to me. But I'll probably eat them, I think. Oh well, it's a beautiful day, and I'm going to enjoy it. As the tragedy that was the flight crash yesterday showed, life is short. (Hope all the people affected by this tragedy will be okay). We must appreciate life, and I have decided that being in the twenties isn't too bad, because at least I get to experience all the highs and lows. When I get older, these feelings of being happy and sad will be more mediocre. 

your love will be safe with me

Hiya! Yesterday I did a little bit of spring cleaning in my bedroom, and now my books are back in my window frame. I was just a bit unsatisfied with keeping them in the little shelf I had standing beside my desk. But now I've removed the shelf, and it looks a bit bare. My sister even stopped by and just stared a bit, before she pointed and asked "didn't something stand here before?" with a frown on her face. Obviously I said "nope, don't know what you're talking about. Your brain have gone all rubbish". But then recognition dawned on her face, and she said "your books!", and then she left. And that's basically the interaction that happens between us. Sometimes I'll stop by her bedroom and ask her what she's doing. Without knocking of course. And she'll shrug and say what she's doing - or sometimes delve into a story I'm too bored to listen to, and then I basically just shut the door. I think I should get an award for being such a good sister. Defnitely. Anyway, my window frame is basically like a book shelf now, and I'm contemplating whether to sort my books alphabetically? I mean, I did do the same thing to my CD collection. You know, one day I dream of owning my own library. Hell to a shoe closet, I'd rather have my own private library. That, or (and) my dream about owning a book store. (sigh) Me and my dreams. The weekend was basically spent reading about tumors, and I've grown weirdly fascinated. Although, perhaps not so weird considering it's actually really fascinating. I've still got to read pathology today, though. It seems like it never stops, and it's a bit depressing spending my holidays reading. Except, not really? I can't regret doing something that's actually enjoyable? And I did enjoy reading about tumors. It's just the fact that this is my curriculum for my exam. And that's usually associated with something boring. But today has been my "day off" - as in me lying in bed and reading a 80k word long fan fiction. It was good, but not enough I guess? I've just realised that I cannot read something where it's about emotions all the time. Unless I'm in the mood for it, I guess. It's just that it's very draining. The funny ones are the best ones. But those are also the hardest to write, hence the lack of good ones (..the good ones go, if you wait too long. I can't help but think of a song to everything I write? It's like there are lyrics burnt into my mind). I'm currently listening to Bloodhound Gang's The Bad Touch. And it's got this brilliant line: "You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals, so let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel". I mean, what a great pick-up line, innit? Anyway, I'm going to do a bit of school work and then watch a movie with my broseph. Did I mention that my brother is home? Well, he is.