home is just a word without a time or place

Ah, back to unhealthy habits: chocolate biscuits and IceTea whilst listening to Gabrielle Aplin on the BBC breakfast radio with Grimmy. I'm still sad about the John Mayer concert tickets. I'm just hoping there will be extra tickets or something. I saw possibly the biggest spider I've ever seen (apart from those people have as pets) at work today. I was just about to wash a sink when I saw the spider crawling from the corner of my eye. My first reaction wasn't to scream or run away. Nope, it was to take a picture. Sometimes I like to torture my belieber friend and Kiwi by sending them pictures of spiders, because they both hate spiders. I know I'm cruel. This was really big though, so I might spare them the fright. For some reason I cannot squish bugs (except for stupid mosquitoes. Hate them). It's just the most disgusting feeling, innit? I managed to flush the spider in the loo. My day was pretty good today, despite the sad weather. I spotted two kids wearing "Gangnam Style" t-shirts, a kid singing Baby by Justin Bieber, and the most precious thing I ever did see happened. Alright so maybe not the most precious thing, but it's definitely top 15. The kindergarten I work in is divided into different sections, and in one of them there's a lot of kids with disabilities that needs a bit of extra care. But they're blended with "normal" kids (I'm not aiming to offend anyone, because who are to define what "normal" is). And today there was this kid who's about five, and he hugged this other kid with down syndrome who's about three, and said "huuuuugggs!". My heart swelled. It was just so precious. But by lunch my phone died on me and I genuinely thought it was dead forever. And it put a damper on my whole day, despite everything that prior to this happening had made my day great. And I really wanted it to pour down with rain when I was cycling home in my shorts. But it only rained a bit. My phone hasn't gone to phone-heaven just yet. I just think it had a phone-heart attack. Oh my god I must have gotten bad spider-karma, because there was a spider crawling on my wall just now. And when I tried removing it with a paper, it fell on my bed. And I screeched, because my poor bed. I managed to toss it out the window though, so everything's alright. Sugar and Marble says I've become a spider magnet. Marble says it's a positive thing. This is live from our Facebook conversation just now, as Sugar and Marble are currently in Greece. I was just thinking about my elder sister, and I thought "oh it feels like a week since I've seen her". You know how sometimes things seems so much longer than reality. Well, I counted down the days, and it actually has been about a week. For each day that goes by, I feel a bit more glum. The leaves on the trees are starting to get yellow. I actually had a little crisis at work because I was washing the window when I spotted a tree with yellow leaves, and I was like "noooooooooo, please don't come yet autumn". Anyway, I'm having a bit of hard time reading My Favourite Wife by Tony Parsons because I so badly want to read what happens after Man and Boy. I just really hope the books will arrive soon. Err, update on the Facebook conversation-- Sugar reckons I should become a ghost or a demon, whereas Marble says I should want to be able to attract snakes. I hope the sun isn't making them delirious. Just informed them that I'm using the conversation in my blogpost, and Sugar refused because she wanted to stay anonymous. So, scratch her name. It's Marble and Esmeralda. Now they're trying synchronized Facebook chatting. Alright, I actually have to go and do some reading. Or something productive.  

the voice of a thousand whispers with answers I can't find

There is something about white duvet covers that reminds me of living in a big white loft or sleeping a hotel bed. My legs looks really tanned against the white, but they're really not. Also, yes I've got white nail varnish on my toes. It turns out that I don't own any nude or "safe" colour for my nails, apart from "Sand Tropez" by Essie. As with my very diverse music taste, I have really diverse dreams too. I dream of becoming a midwife, but I also dream of working in an office typing away documents. I dream of living in a little cottage filled with personal objects everywhere, showing off my life. But I also dream of living in a completely white loft with a madrass on the floor covered in white sheets and duvets beneath a wall painted with the world map in black and white. Yesterday I made myself a really lovely salad. I didn't realise I was a salad-person, actually I didn't realise I was a healthy-person. But instead of snacking on chocolate crackers, I've been snacking on pistachio nuts. It actually freaks me out a bit, when I develop healthy habits, because I feel like I'm losing a bit of my identity as the one who loves unhealthy stuff. Which I do realise sounds ridiculous, but it does feel a bit odd to have quit soda and sweets (except chocolate of course) for ages. It turns out that Man and Boy not only have a sequel, but it's a third book too! I've ordered them both, and I hope they'll come in the mail before I go to Aalesund. In the meantime I'll read My Favourite Wife. It appears that this Tony Parsons guy happens to be a journalist, so it was a funny coincidence to see his name on the new covers of GQ with One Direction on them. I'm not quite sure what I think of the under text on the covers.. seems like GQ are definitely trying to provoke interest in readers. Hopefully the journalist has been professional, and not mis-quoted the lads, as so many journalists seem to do these days. And don't you hate journalists that hasn't done their research? Anyway, there's this little kid in the kindergarten I speak to from time to time. He's about five, I think. And today he greeted me with a nod (seriously, he nodded at me) "washing woman". And I smiled politely back, before he went inside another room. Seconds later, though, he came back. "Erm, I meant washing girl". It made me laugh, because of course, not even a five year old sees me as a woman. Great new. I've been listening to Start Again by Gabrielle Aplin all day, and it's so incredibly pretty. I'm still sad about the John Mayer concert tickets. But Kiwi has apparently bought me a One Direction cup, which will be a nice addition to my collection of cups. I will admit that I do still miss the Coca Cola glass I got from Ale. I'll have to try finding a replacement. It's just not the same without it. Oh, my really complicated life, eh? Ha-ha. By the way, isn't Kiwi the best? I always feel so lucky to have my friends - they are incredible. Despite it being a Monday, it was a really nice day today. I woke up feeling tired as usual, but the weather was lovely except for the wind. And there's nothing like it when cars stop for you at pedestrian crossings. And genuine smiles and hellos from people you see every day. And when people hold the door for you. Or when you don't die in the traffic because of your reckless biking. It's just those little things that reminds me that yeah, I've got it good. I'm a bit sad that it's only ten days left of my summer job, no it's nine actually. I just really don't want to go back to school. It's like I feel exhausted already, and I've nearly not thought about school at all. I know it's not that bad at all, but I just really despise all the stress that comes along with school. Anyway, I'm heading to my rather white bed now. Need to get a bit of sleep, because I did feel rather tired today. 

when the night before has left you and the smoke has filled your lungs

Err, I just watched a video of a baby sloth getting shaved, buttered and wrapped in bandages because it was sick. Tumblr is an interesting place. I ended up going to bed at 3:30 am yesterday, because it wasn't enough to spend time on my stroller obsession. I also did the mistake of watching a few One Direction videos from the recent concerts, which sparked the idea of watching videos of them in Norway. And then I got really emotional, because I'm so grateful I've gotten to see them live, whereas there are so many people that don't get the opportunity. And then my mind was racing back to the Best Song Ever music video and when Zayn sings: "I hope you'll remember how we danced", and they show the lads on the flying thing in their concert. Which made me think of their three year anniversary, which reminded me of my Tumblr dashboard filled with old pictures and gifs from they first got together. It was just really emotional. Anyway, I watched the second episode of Skins Pure last night, and I don't know. I always thought these episodes with the old cast would leave me feel satisfied. But I'm not- I'm left unsatisfied, starved. I will admit that I liked Skins Fire with Effy a lot more, because it seemed more like Skins, also there were other old cast members of Skins. Whereas in Skins Pure, there were only Cassie herself. And everyone else were new. Cassie will always confuse me, which probably is why I love her so much. I just cannot understand her. But hey, Gabrielle Aplin's song Start Again was in this episode, and I've always loved Skins for their choice of music. I'm just glad that for once I knew about this artist before Skins introduced me to them. The lyrics are astonishing as always. Gabbie will always remind me of the female version of Ed Sheeran. Always. Ever since I've fallen in love with John Mayer's music again, I've been itching to attend a concert of his. And of course he's coming here in October. And guess who's his supporter? Gabrielle Aplin. It's like the world is testing me, because the tickets are sold out, and I'm just fuck. I wouldn't mind going on the concert alone, but aaaahhhh just want to hit myself sometimes. If it starts pouring down outside, I might just go drench myself. Right now I'm drawing/writing a bit. I'm planning on watching a film I've been wanting to watch for a while. And continue on Man and Boy, because it's really good! Might go to bed early tonight, seeing as I woke up at 10:30 am. I just cannot get myself to sleep long? It's probably just because of the brightness that comes along with the summer.