cause I can't stop wondering if I was too late to see the signs

Nice buns, hun. Ah, am almost salivating, just thinking of freshly baked cinnamon buns. I am currently listening to the Breakfast show from this morning. I've not listened to it in weeks! Maybe a month or so? It's crazy. I'm mostly listening to it because Grimmy had Nick Jonas on it. Oh my god, "where the hell is Fiona?". What a great start Grimmy. Did you get some reprimand for cursing by Finchy? Apart from Monday, this week has been really great. And it's flown by so quickly, which is probably because I'm usually in bed at 9:15 pm, which sounds ridiculous to myself. However, life is so much better when you get a decent amount of hours of sleep. At least it has been to me. Today was interesting due to the people I worked with at "praksis". It was a bit messily organised, but it was fine anyway. We managed, though we've had really ill patients as of late. We went to a lunch meeting at noon, which sort of screwed up our time schedule a bit. We got back at quarter to one, and I had to go to my "praksis" meeting at 1:30 pm. I somehow always forget about my "praksis" meeting, so it was only when I saw my teacher talking with employees, that I realised. We have presentations each week, but luckily I didn't have to have one this time. Though, as my teacher was talking about a book that she put on the table for us to look at, I was coincidentally looking at it. "In the first pages there's a picture of a river. Can you find it for us to see?". I did as she said, and displayed it to the rest of the table like a presenter of diamond rings on sale. Ala Bridget Jones mum' when she starts dating (fake tanned) Julian. Someone around the table jokingly said: "well, you should tell us something about it then". I laughed because it was a joke. But then my teacher actually said: "can you read what it says?". It's good that I like my group enough to not feel any shyness, as I started rambling about the picture. Ah, imagine if I just started talking bullshit and started analyse the picture. Agh, I have to exercise now, then I'm going to jump in the shower (not literally). I think I might catch up on Youtube later and just relax. Hiya weekend! (insert waving emoji). 

we'll hate what we lost, but we'll love what we find

When my belieber friend asked me what my type was, I said: "I don't think I have one". I think it went a day before I realised that I do indeed have a type. I just don't think I had realised it yet. Agh, I don't know if I'll actually ever revise, as it seems like I've just given up. Am hoping for some sudden inspiration to hit me, but I know I just have to force myself to work. I just have to start. It's Wednesday already, which means the days are going by far quicker than I sometimes can comprehend. Tomorrow is the start of my weekend, though I'm aiming for a doctors appointment on Friday. I'm frightened to write it down, just in case I'll jinx myself. I mean, I must get an appointment some time? The most annoying part is that I just want to take a blood sample to check that things are in order. And tbh, I could probably have taken a blood sample of myself by myself. Anyway, today was a good day. Aggy and I went on a mandatory fire-extinguishing thing?? Not sure what it's called, but we had to extinguish a fire on a doll. We all got dressed in what looked like farm suits, and slightly reminded me of being a "russ" (ah good memories!). Then we were shepherded into a small room with a door leading to another room. We were all standing in line, waiting for our turns. "This is an exercise where you'll have to extinguish some smoke with a fire blanket". He said "some smoke". Can you blame me for being shocked when I then ran inside the room to see actual flames? "Holy shit, is it real?" I think I said, when I got inside. I managed to put out the fire, though I don't think I realised it was actual flames before I'd gone outside again. Aggy and I had lunch in the cafeteria today-- with Faye, Sugar and Sally. When walking back to my "praksis", Aggy asked if I knew them all. And I went on a long story of how I know them all. It's sort of funny to see them all together when I've got so many different memories of all of them. When I got home today, I watched a recorded version of today's cross country skiing race. Was disappointed, but yet not really. It's probably because I've not been watching all of the races. It's not like I can go sit watch TV whilst I'm at "praksis". Oyster just agreed to make cinnamon buns for me this weekend. I've not seen her in ages, I think. At least it feels like it, and I can't wait to see the house. I keep wanting chocolate, but when Saturday comes around I eat one bar, or no chocolate at all. It's really annoying. I want to say that I'm gonna go revise now, but I am going to read some fan fiction as usual. 

I know there's California, Oklahoma and all of the places I ain't ever been to. But down in the valley with Whiskey rivers: these are the places you will find me hiding. These are the places I will always go

Whilst at "praksis" today, I briefly looked at my mail, which informed me that there's a deal on plane tickets to Dublin. Each time I see that there's cheap plane tickets, I imagine going. Sometimes it feels like it's my second home country, though I've got no biological belonging there whatsoever. Ugh, Kodaline, why did you have to remind me of the brilliance that is Ireland? Before the gig on Saturday, they played various music. Including Down In The Valley by The Head And The Heart. I thought I'd maybe heard it before, because it sounded really familiar. But then I realised I had not, and now I've just been jamming to it. I'm pretty sure I had a strange dream last night, because I woke up feeling a bit weird. It's already halfway through the week, which means the weekend is soon here. Lols. I have got to start revising! Honestly, the exam is probably not going to go well considering I've made no effort. I talked to Aggy today, and she said she's really tired of "praksis". Same with Faye. And the same with another student. I think we're all pretty much drained right now. I just want to go back to school and enjoy the freedom whilst it lasts. A last hurrah. I ought to go eat now, then hopefully read my notes for the exam. I didn't do it yesterday, as it was far more enticing to read a fan fiction of course. 

you’re in my head and my heart and it feels much better

Here's my new mug. It's the new album cover for Coming Up For Air. Admittedly I've not purchased the new album, though I did actually look for it in the store today. A while ago I think I wrote about my dismay about their first single, Honest. And I still love their first album (In A Perfect World) far more. That also includes choice of album cover. However, I've admitted to falling in love with Ready from the new album, so who knows how many songs I'll learn to love. Plus, I still think they're ridiculously talented. Hands down, I'd attend another concert in a heartbeat. Today was quite tiresome, and I'm guessing it's not getting any better when I feel like I'm constantly waiting for "praksis" to be over with. It was mostly tiresome due to lack of organisation. And when doctors come asking me for things, in my head I'm like: "I'm just a student, go away, don't ask me". In real like I try to find/do the things they ask me for. It's fine because they'll see it in my facial expression if they're asking for something outside my skills or knowledge. Today especially, I was in the midst of helping a new doctor, then I had to half-way do a report for the people doing the evening shift. In the midst of this, a person came to ask me about my "praksis" meeting this upcoming Thursday. In other words, my head was a mess, and I was unable to prioritise. I'm hoping for a better day tomorrow, and hopefully less messy. Thinking about the day whilst waiting for the bus made me a bit mellow, then the bus even drove by. However, it doesn't seem like it's a day where every little detail is tearing down my shield. Because when the bus drove by, I just thought of the Kodaline concert, and I was cured! I realised I got to listen to All I Want live, which has been on my wish list for a long time. I've stood two and a half meters from Steve Garrigan (the vocalist)-- I've listened to him sing live. That's actually one of my dreams come true right there. As insignificant that might sound to people, I've now crossed off one of my many dreams. And that's why, despite all the "bad" things happened today, I've yet to feel knocked down. The only thing that's slightly tearing at me right now, is the fact that I should be revising. I would love to do anything but. I am actually going to take the exam, but how well prepared I'll be is another question. I've finally decided on a theme for the bachelor, and I've sent it off. Which means I won't have to think about it until I have to. That means that I don't have anything else to focus on, rather than revising. But that reminds me of something I read on Tumblr yesterday, and thought was brilliant: "Instead of saying "I don't have time" try saying "it's not a priority," and see how that feels. Often, that's a perfectly adequate explanation. I have time to iron my sheets, I just don't want to. But other things are harder. Try it: "I'm not going to edit your résumé, sweetie, because it's not a priority." "I don't go to the doctor because my health is not a priority." If these phrases don't sit well, that's the point. Changing our language reminds us that time is a choice. If we don't like how we're spending an hour, we can choose differently". 

I met you on the corner of the street. I smiled before I even heard you speak

When I left home yesterday, I had managed to spill nail varnish on my bed sheets and the floor, which I then had to ask Monchita to clean up due to fresh varnish on my nails. I watched cross country skiing for the first time in forever, and I was really peeved that Didrik didn't win a medal. However, despite all the bad things that happened to me, it didn't manage to throw me off that positive vibe I was feeling. The bus was even on time for once, which is something I've burned myself on a lot. My attempt to scare Marble, however, was failed. She sensed my appearance before I could even attempt. We met up with Kiwi, who lead us astray through a block of cozy houses that resembled anything else that I associate with Oslo. Eventually we ended up at the hipster cafe/restaurant/bar she wanted to go to. I had this really nice spinach dish. I love dishes with spinach in it, and I'm yearning for some saag. Marble and I had a bottle of Estrella, and we got Kiwi to explain us the difference between vegetarians and vegans. Turns out it was a lot more complicated than we initially thought. We had time on our side, and got to the venue an hour before the doors opened. Why, you might ask. Well, in Kiwi and I's experience, we've always underestimated the popularity of acts, and we always end up standing behind all these tall people. Marble and I had bought a pint each, and Kiwi had managed to withdraw money from somewhere to buy herself a t-shirt and a mug for me. Course I bought a mug! Anyway, shortly after that, the fire alarm went! I think we all just looked at each other first, "seriously?". It appeared that it was indeed serious, and we were all shepherded outside. Our pints were plucked out of our hands: "no alcohol outside," he told our confused faces. Luckily he just put them inside for us to pick em up after the fire alarm. We were asked to move across the road, and to my shock I could actually see smoke, and then a fire truck. And more shockingly, Steve, the vocalist of Kodaline came outside to stand with the merchandise guy and had a quick fag. I snapped a picture because I'm quite shameless. Then when the fire alarm was off, and things were declared safe, we ran in again, only to be stopped by the guard. He asked if I had any drinks in my bag, and I said no. He fished up my Kodaline mug, and I said: "right, my mug, which I bought". He said "oh, well, good buy!". Picked up my pint and went to stand in line again. When we finally got in, we managed to get pretty good places. I was being strategic, so I went to stand where I knew Steve would be standing. By then it was 8 pm, and we waited for an hour before the supporter came to play his set. He was impressive, because he could sing in a very wide range. However, his songs were kind of very similar. I was almost sure he sang the same song twice, which Marble later confirmed that he did not do. We then waited another hour before Kodaline came to play at 10 pm. In the meanwhile these people testing instruments came to do their job, and one of them looked bloody gorgeous. One of the first things I did when I saw him, was to turn to Marble: "he's really good looking," I said, pointing at him. It didn't even occur to me that might have been Norwegian and could understand what I said. A little later on, Kiwi said the same thing to me. Marble was sandwiched between us. We commented on his arms. "He's got good veins". Marble looked at us slightly appalled. I was blatantly staring to be honest. He had a good face, good bum, good arms, good everything it seemed. I was slightly ashamed by myself, thinking "wow, am I objectifying this person?". But that didn't stop me, lols. When Kodaline finally appeared, the excitement thrummed my body, and seemingly a lot of other's too. They started out with Ready, which I only recently heard, but have fallen in love with, so I sang along to all the words I know. My blogpost title yesterday is from it, and I just thought it was such a nice lyric: "never let the pressure tell you that you’re not capable of being everything that you want". Kodaline was amazing. I had already heard that they're good live, but they really exceeded my expectations. They sounded like the studio version, and they barely had any breaks in between the songs. It was a distinct difference between the old album and the new one. More instrument filled, I thought, because I could feel the instruments played in my veins. That's the thing about concerts-- you'll never listen to a song like you do during a concert. It was nice singing all the lyrics to songs I've listened to so many times. I was contemplating whether to film the whole of All I Want or not, because I hate spending so much time filming things when I can just stand there and enjoy it. So I started filming, then I stopped, then I started filming again. And I'm really happy I did, because I knew I'd regret it if I didn't. I was standing so close to the stage anyway, so I didn't really have to keep watching my phone to see that it was filming Steve. So I managed to enjoy it anyway, and sang along to all the words. I really enjoyed the parts during the concert where the crowd sang along. It just proved how much people enjoy Kodaline's songs. I have to admit that I was slightly distracted by "nice bum and arms"-lad standing at the side. I could look right at him, where he was hiding behind the curtains. The only thing is that, I couldn't blatantly stare at him then, when everyone was staring at Kodaline. It was acceptable to stare at him when he and the rest of the crew were on stage doing their job-- because everyone else were staring. So I tried to be conspicuous about my staring, trying to not make him realise I was doing it. Obviously I wasn't, because he caught me a few times. Admittedly I'm not usually one to stare at people, which means I obviously don't have the ability to be conspicuous about it. Had I been more brave (drunk, perhaps), I wouldn't have shied away when he caught me. I think it must have been infatuation by first sight, because I couldn't stop staring at his face, is the thing. I thought to myself, that he must be Irish, because he looked so much like it. That's a thing I'd almost forgotten-- that Kodaline is Irish. Hearing them speak was so so nice. It hit me with nostalgia, and I was looking through videos of when I was in Ireland today. I just think I'm always going to be in love with Ireland. Anyway, I had a good day yesterday though I'd love to properly meet "nice bum and arms". Too bad I'll probably never see him again. 

never let the pressure tell you that you’re not capable of being everything that you want

Yesterday was quite a day! Meeting up with the kilo-gang was a long time coming, and I got to see my belieber friend's engagement ring in flesh. It's really gorgeous, more than my ickle camera could capture. She told us the story, and we started discussing wedding plans. I even wrote down a date in my calendar, though it's not set in stone. I still can't believe I've come this far in life, that friends around my age are getting engaged and married. We also got to meet Sugar's new beau? My belieber friend, Kiwi and I were all a bit anxious to be honest. I only got to know about this person last week when Sugar, Marble, Ale and I met up at a restaurant. And if you knew Sugar, you'd know that her bringing her love interest to meet us is actually a big (sort of) deal. At least it was to me. From what I gathered, he was actually quite nice, so that's a relief. Imagine meeting someone important to someone, then discovering they're awful? After sitting around at school for far longer than intended, we headed home. I went to my belieber friend's because I told her I would. We met up with Darren in the grocery store because apparently Friday is their grocery shopping day. At one point I somewhat lost them in the store, and when I saw Darren, I told him "it felt a lot like getting lost from your parents in the store". I bought a pack of tea, despite the fact that I've really stepped down the amount of tea I drink. It's not been a concious decision, just like with the chocolate biscuits. I don't think it's a permanent thing either, it's just that I like enjoying my cup of tea. And lately it's felt like I've not had time for it. I also bought a chocolate ice cream as it was Friday. My belieber friend and I had been discussing cheez doodles, and our obsession with it. Once you eat one, you can't stop until you've had the whole bag. So my belieber friend came with a 250g pack of cheez doodles, and I asked her if it was cheaper than two packs of 130g. The reason for why I asked her this, is because when Lynx was visiting, we got into a habit of buying cheez doodles. I was the one to pick them out, because my sister had asked me to choose a snack. And as I was studying the prices, I was shocked to see that it would be cheaper to buy two small ones, instead of a big pack. And yesterday we realised that it was indeed cheaper to buy two small ones, though only with a tiny amount. When we got back to my belieber friend's, we had pizza made by her. I'm so spoiled I get everything served at a plate. Out of seemingly nowhere, Darren said I'd probably be a good midwife (or earthmuthr?? as he jokingly?? called it). I asked if my belieber friend had told him that's what I want to become, and he said no. Admittedly he'd seen a spread about midwifes on a magazine lying right next to me. Despite that, it was weird, and I'm convinced my belieber friend once upon a time told him, and it's something that just popped out of his subconscious. But I have to say that I'm strangely synchronised with my friends nowadays. An example is how my belieber friend finished a sentence for me yesterday. Whilst discussing with Darren yesterday, I had a realisation that he reminds me a lot of my own brother. I just felt so familiar with the unnecessary bickering, and realised it's exactly what I do with my own brother. We ended up watching a bit of Yes To The Dress, though quite old episodes. I really want to go to the shop to buy a wedding magazine, only I can't be bothered to get dressed right now. I got home around 10:00 pm, went to bed around midnight and woke up at 8:00 am this morning. My bedroom was a mess when I got in yesterday, so I spent a little time trying to clean up a bit. I've finally put my old laptop away, though it's always in my reach. I am about to jump in the shower to get ready for today's shenanigans. Kiwi, Marble and I are going to see Kodaline live! We got the tickets mid-December, so in that sense, it's not been a long await. However, we have been waiting to see Kodaline since autumn/winter of 2013, so it has been a while. Life is looking up at the moment, and I'm going to bask in these joyous feelings. 

going out tonight, changes into something red

Today was definitely not my day. I did actually wake up, tired, feeling like crying with a headache on top of it. All of this despite sleeping enough. Admittedly I woke up at 3:00 am to go to the loo, then I abruptly woke up at 4:00 am in the midst of a dream where I was having a fight with another nurse or summat. Later on, I had nightmares that seemed a bit delirious to be honest. It was super creepy. If I'm not coming down with something, then I don't know what. Oh my god, I just got a sudden ache for some french fries. I also really want a hotdog. The latter I've been wanting for ages. Anyway, "praksis" today felt a lot more like work, and I had an awful patient that sucked all the energy and joy out of me. Perhaps it's because I already started the day off feeling a bit unwell, but I'm not usually so easily deterred. It's like the patient was a leech, draining all my blood. On a happier note, the boss had brought with a bunch of belgian waffles, and it was so good. Since Aggy is having a night shift today, she won't be at "praksis" tomorrow. On Thursdays we usually have a "praksis" meeting, and since our presentations were postponed the last time, I'll have to present both of our presentations tomorrow. I'm not really looking forward to that at all, but it'll be over in a whim probably, and then it'll be the weekend. Although I'm actually going to school for the first time in months on Friday. The due date for my theme for my bachelor is creeping up on me, and I think I might have to work on that this weekend. Er, not "think". I must. I had some sushi when I got home today and an ice lolly. The latter seems to have become my new obsession. I have an ice lolly if I'm feeling like having something sweet. But I also have one if I'm feeling nauseous. It really helps. I am currently reading a One Direction fanfiction for the first time in ages whilst listening to a playlist called "The Elves of Mirkwood". If you're familiar with Lord of The Rings or the Hobbit, you might recognise it. Anyway, it's Chinese New Year today, so happy new year! 

tried to keep you close to me, but life got in between

I've been a bit off today. My nose is running, my stomach is weird, my neck aches, have been a bit dizzy at times throughout the whole day. I don't know whether it's because of lack of sleep, or if I'm coming down with something. Hopefully it's not the latter because that would be shitty timing. It's only Tuesday, but in my mind it's the weekend really soon. I can't wait. I'm getting sick of "praksis", and right now it just feels like I'm waiting for it to end, counting the days and hours left. Yesterday I met Sugar in the wardrobe on my way home, and I told her about Ale's wish to go go-carting. Sugar told me it'd be nice to see Ale, and somehow we made plans to meet up later. We ended up at a very familiar restaurant. Ale and Sugar had something to eat, whereas Marble and I stuck to tea. It's weird, but I've been drinking less tea as of late. I don't know if I'm growing out of the habit, or if it's just temporary. Anyway, it was good to be gathered yesterday, just chatting and catching up. I'm gonna see the kilo-gang on Friday, then I'm gonna see Kodaline live with Marble and Kiwi. They're both events I'm looking forward to, because it's been awhile. It's always good to be surrounded by people you like. I am actually gonna go to bed now, I think. It's just a lot nicer to wake up and feel fully rested rather than tired and on the brink of crying. 

I want that red velvet, I want that sugar sweet

Yesterday I had three drinks too many. I was regretting it this morning, but now not so much. I've not had this much to drink in ages, and like I told Marble and Ale: it's weird because usually you're more rational when you grow older. In my case it's been the opposite, because a younger me would cringe at current me and yell "drink more water". But then again I already knew what the consequences would be anyway. I can't find it in myself to regret it, because yesterday was a pretty darn good evening/night. We made tacos at Marble's and filled our stomachs to the brim, then we played Cards Against Humanity whilst pregaming. I've seen a bit of CAH on Tumblr, but I didn't actually know what the game was about until yesterday. By 11:00 pm we had all gotten quite a bit of alcohol in our systems, and it was definitely showing. I had to apply mascara whilst not being sober because there weren't any free mirrors at the time I was doing my eye make-up. So, whilst doing my mascara I was thinking "ah who cares if I get a bit mascara on my eyelid or under my eye. No biggie". Sober-me would never have agreed with that. Luckily I managed to avoid a mess. I never want to give off drunken vibes to my own parents or my friends parents. But I'm sure we all did yesterday, which is great. On the train to the city, we were chatting, and I wondered to myself if we were being really loud. You know how sometimes when people are drunk, they get obnoxiously loud? Anyway, in the end I didn't care. We went to a club that I used to go to quite frequently, but I've not been at the club for a year or so. Ale wanted to go to this club because she hadn't been before, and what Ale wants is what she gets. We all got a pint and sat down in the sofa with some friends of Ale's. By the first sip of my pint, I knew the wise decision would be to stop now when the night was still young. I'm pretty sure I told Marble I shouldn't have more to drink, but yesterday was a day of not listening to my rational side. Shortly after finishing my pint, Marble and I hit the dance floor. And it was just like good ol' times. The exception is that I had more alcohol in my system than I am used to, and therefore not completely in control of my limbs and senses. After working up a sweat on the dance floor, Marble said (or shouted) that we should take shots. When we got to the bar, she said that we should take "Kamikaze", which I then proceeded to order. As I mentioned, I was not completely in control of myself, and found myself chatting with a Swede or summat, whilst Marble was having a conversation with some guy. I had forgotten about the shot until I felt an ice cube hit me, and I realised it was the bartender's way to alert me about the shot. I took it, and then I think I told Marble I was gonna go sit down for a bit because I was feeling slightly uneasy about not being in complete (well, somewhat) control. This is where the lines are a bit blurry, because I'm not sure what happened next. All I know is that I sat down in the sofa, and I ended up staying there for almost the rest of the night. When I'm more sober, I'll usually be at the dance floor, but when I've had too much to drink, I usually find a place to sit down. The good thing about that, is that you get to meet a lot of new people. Can't honestly say that I remember all of the names, but I rarely do when I'm sober anyway. I was chatting away with some guy (guy 1) who somehow knows the gang Ale are friends with. And according to him I had asked his age twice, which I have no recollection of. After a while, he had to use the loo, and told me to keep a spot for him. "Sure," I told him, and then proceeded to look out of the window. Shortly after, a group of people approached me and asked if they could sit on the chairs opposite of me. When they did, the girl leaned over the table that separated us and asked: "hey, are you alright?". In hindsight I can understand her concerns, because I was actually sat alone in a big sofa, staring out of the window. I didn't even bother to look at my phone to at least act like I was preoccupied with something. I felt very touched by the concern, but I did tell her that I was there with my friends, and that I was just waiting for that guy to come back. A guy from the group came to sit beside me, and we had a little chat. I think I somehow told him that I should drink more water, because not long after he presented me with a glass of water, which was a really nice gesture. Some time after, Marble showed up beside me. And I think the group of people left, which is when another group of men asked if they could sit down. To my surprise, they were from a place close to my home town, and I got to use my dialect with them. I mostly talked with the guy (guy 2) beside me, and he was really nice. I've got no idea how long we were chatting, because my phone was safely tucked away in my bag, and I think I looked at it twice in total during the time I was sat in the sofa. Marble and Ale announced to me that they were gonna go dancing, and Marble asked if I wanted to tag along, but I declined. Shortly after, guy 1 from before came to vacate the spot that Marble had left beside me. "There you are!" I said to him. He laughed, and said that when he'd gotten back from the loo, the sofa had been preoccupied with men, and that there hadn't been any space for him. I felt slightly bad, because I was supposed to keep a seat for him. It didn't matter much anyway, because we proceeded chatting. But this time I had guy 2 beside me, and I was delighted to see them both chat with each other and get along. Guy 1 went off to the bar and came back with a pint and two shots of Kamikazi's for us. My brain was telling me: "seriously, you've had enough alcohol". But again, I didn't listen to my brain, and instead took that shot. Around that time, I think Marble came to collect me, because apparently it was 2:30 am, and only half an hour left until the club would shut down. We usually always spend the last half an hour on the dance floor. So I said goodbye to guy 1, and guy 2 said he'd join us on the dance floor, which he did. I hadn't spent that much time with Marble and Ale both whilst being at the club, so this might have been the longest sequence we actually spent together. Anyway, I danced and smiled-- I was just having a good time. When the lights came on, we went to the bar to ask for some water. I said goodbye to guy 2 with some kind of hug, I think. We grabbed our coats, I was grabbed by a male who told me we'd talk outside later. I was amused, and left to go outside where Marble and I waited for Ale. We took the night bus back to Marble's, and I was in bed by 5:00 am. Don't you think I woke up at 10:00 am? Well, I tried to go back to sleep, but after an hour of trying, I gave up. This Sunday morning was spent trying to not get sick, drinking lots of water, and eating minimal. It was a relief to get home and have a shower, despite finding a new bruise that hurts like hell. I'm feeling much better now, and I'm gonna go hit the bed soon so I can feel somewhat normal tomorrow. 

This ain't love, it's clear to see

Hiya babes. It's finally Friday (albeit Friday the 13th), though it feels a lot like I was just working during the weekend. I guess the days are passing like lightning nowadays. I had a good day at "praksis" today despite being awfully tired. We had a little longer break than usual because it was mostly calm and we had the time for it. For some reason there were a lot of laughs today as well, which is a good way to spend a Friday. The reason for my tiredness today is because I kept reading a fanfiction yesterday, and I just couldn't find the will in me to stop it when my bedtime passed. So it's entirely my own fault. After "praksis" yesterday, I chilled for a few hours, sorting out my pictures. A week ago I put in an order to develop some pictures from 2013 and 2014. The package arrived a few days ago, but it wasn't until yesterday that I could find enough time to sort them out. I hadn't realised there would be so many pictures, so now I need a new photo album to store the rest of the pictures. After eating, I went to the mall to meet up with Ale. I gave her a good scare, and it's good that it wasn't in a store with a lot of breakable things. Cause I hadn't thought that far. Ale bought two pair of shoes, and I bought those highwaisted jeans I was looking for the other day. It appears that a few days after I was in the store, they'd gotten in more jeans in my size. This is my actual first pair of highwaisted jeans, so I'm delighted. After wandering around at the mall, we decided to go back to where Ale is currently staying. We ate cake and drank tea in the kitchen. I pointed out to Ale that I felt very grown up doing that. But it was really nice because we got to just catch up. I mean, I haven't actually seen her since September last year when she came to stay and we went to see Pharrell live. I'm going to hang out with her this weekend, along with Marble. We might go out, we might stay in, we might bake. We might do a lot of things. It's Friday and I'm so happy I've got this weekend off, because I'm soooo tired. 

I was scared of pretty girls and starting conversations

I'm currently having a laptop party with myself. On my old one, I'm currently watching a video of One Direction performing Girl Almighty. It's one of the songs I'm really looking forward to watch live because it's such an upbeat one, and the lads seem to really enjoy performing it. I'm crossing my fingers that they actually get down on their knees at least once this tour. It'll be a sight to behold. In less than two weeks I'm gonna see Kodaline with Kiwi and Marble, which I'm really looking forward to. I've been afraid to think too much about the concert, because I'm still afraid that it'll get cancelled like the last time. I will be seriously disappointed if they don't perform All I Want, because that's all I want. Today was a good and slow day at "praksis". It was just nice, to be honest. I think I needed a day like that. After "praksis" I met Sally in the wardrobe, and I might get a ride with her home tomorrow as we're both working an evening shift. I stopped by the mall on my way home because I had to buy Microsoft Office for my new laptop. I also wanted to look at a bikini top from H&M which I saw on their website yesterday. When I got there, however, I realised it's probably too early for them to start selling their bikini's in the shops. I also wanted to buy a pair of high waisted jeans that Marble tipped me about the other week when I was at the mall with her and Kiwi. Sadly they were out of my size in the colour I wanted. I was actually contemplating going to the city to try find a pair, but I couldn't be bothered. I might do it this weekend when I have a day off. I thought to myself that there was no way I'd go into town for a pair of jeans. But then I realised I also need new Muji gel pens, and then I was all on board. That's me, I care more about pens than jeans. I finished writing the paper yesterday, but it's not due for a week. I just wanted to finish it so I don't have to think anymore about it as I've got quite a bit on my plate at the moment. I was half tempted to watch The Maze Runner, and I still might because I've been missing Teen Wolf and seeing Dylan O'Brien's face. Also, Kaya Scodelario aka. Effy Stonem from Skins is in the movie as well. My sister said it was okay, so I don't know. But I've been missing having something to watch, and I refuse getting into another TV show for a while. But I've got to finish up writing notes for the exam because I have to start revising, seeing as it's a month left. I also need to find a theme for my bachelor, which I keep forgetting about. I also need a break from life, but that's not going to happen anytime soon it seems. Oh well, I just have to appreciate the small moments I get to myself. Like when I had some grapes and vanilla-quark for dessert after dinner. Jeez that's soooo bloody good. I actually thought "this is better than chocolate".   

Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips. We should just kiss like real people do

Apart from cleaning my bedroom and (partly) the living room, this day have been very unproductive thus far. In my mourning of watching the last episodes of S4 yesterday, I've been googling all the cast members of TW. I even contemplated rewatching a few episodes, but I figured that would be stupid both because of wasting time, and because I've seen all the episodes so recently. My favourite characters throughout all the seasons have been Stiles, Derek and Lydia. It was really nice to see the evolution of Derek in S4, and yes please to more shirtlessness. It's awful to say this because I never thought I'd say it: but yes please to the intense romance novel vibe with the "big bad wolf". The other day I bought myself a new duvet cover, because I can rarely resist duvet covers. Could easily add it to the long list of my obsessions. I've still yet to read the new Marian Keyes book, and to be honest I don't really have the time for it at the moment anyway. But it looks pretty on my new duvet covers, and on top of my new laptop. I almost dropped my laptop yesterday; I was just holding it with one hand, but I hadn't realised the weight difference between the new and my old one. Luckily I managed to avoid dropping it. Monchita says I should just start using the new laptop and ditch my old one, that it'll be better for me. But I just can't let this computer go just yet, which is stupid because I don't actually need two laptops. I really don't want to have "praksis" tomorrow. It's just not very tempting. Except for the part where Kiwi apparently have left me a post-it on some surface somewhere at "praksis". I was just browsing through Facebook yesterday after work, and I couldn't believe my own eyes when I first saw it. And especially when I realised it was announced on Saturday. My belieber friend and Darren got engaged, and apparently I've even gotten a snap of the ring some time. I just can't recall any of it. It's weird, because I knew it was going to happen. But still, it's kinda surreal to think that one of my bestest friends has just gotten engaged. Congratulations to the couple, and may they serve hot dogs sometime during the wedding. Right now I am going to write a paper that's due next week, cause I don't know how much time I'll have for school work this week. Hopefully I can get it done by today. 

just remember when you come up, the show goes on

My first impression of the OTRA tour, is that it's just a sequel to WWA tour. They could honestly have named it WWA tour II. It's basically the same stage, same songs, same choreography. It's just the same thing really, which is crap for the ones who've been at a WWA concert, but good for the ones who haven't. To be honest I'm really disappointed, and for the ones interested, this is a review of the first concert. I realise this sounds very negative, and perhaps my negativity is influenced by the fact that they don't perform Stockholm Syndrome, which was one of the songs I was mostly looking forward to. However, I need to remember that this is my first impression, and it's the start of the tour. And who knows if they'll change their setlist. My goodness, I can only hope they do. On another note, I had a very slow day at work yesterday. It was really nice to see some of the people I've not seen in months, though I didn't get to see any of my previous nurse supervisors. Today was the opposite of yesterday. When my colleagues are stressed, it affects everyone, which means everyone gets stressed out. I feel like I was just running around from room to room, and at one point there was an ambulance coming, and everyone was busy with their patients, and ah, just chaos. I was listening to The Show Goes On by Lupe Fiasco whilst walking home after work, and it was the perfect song to reflect to, and just put today's happenings behind me. Also, I just really love that song. I'm really happy I've got the day off tomorrow, because on Tuesday I've got "praksis" again, and it's been a loooooooong week. After work yesterday, I went to the post office where I picked up my new laptop. I made a purchase last week, after my brother's advice. The "new laptop" project has been something I've wanted to get done for ages, so last week I basically just told my brother to find a computer for me. I just couldn't be bothered to care about any details whatsoever. I basically put all my trust into my brother's words, and bought something I'd barely read anything about. Maybe that's why I wasn't as excited about the computer when I unpacked it yesterday, whereas my brother inspected it. "It looks sleek," he said. I shrugged, said: "I guess". I sat in the living room yesterday with Teen Wolf on this computer, whilst trying to get used to Windows 8 and just a new computer in general on the new laptop. It was actually a bit nice. I would do it today as well. However, I've only got two episodes left of the 4th season of TW. I just thought I'd enjoy them properly without any interruptions tonight. I've just had a chat with Ale, who is coming to visit in a few days. I've not seen her since September, and I can't wait to see her again. I had one mini bar of chocolate yesterday. And I've subconsciously stopped eating chocolate biscuits, despite having at least four packs of my favourite kind in the house. I'm not sure what's happened, but I think my body is thanking me for it. Who knows how long it'll last. Right now I think I might have an apple to go with the two last episodes of Teen Wolf. Hope you've had a good weekend x.  

I walked out and said "I'm setting you free". But the monsters turned out to be just trees, and when the sun came up you were looking at me

Red strings and a supposedly grandma, jumping into a sea cold enough to freeze to ice on the top, washing away blackness in the shower. It's not a surprise to me that my dreams have been inspired by Teen Wolf. Remember when I wrote that I wouldn't be able to watch the whole of S3 within this week? Well, guess what I've been doing today on my day off. Honestly, I can't recommend spending a day marathon-ing TW without breaks. It's made me really strange. Might just be the season, and the increasing creepiness of it. But I've definitely been a bit more paranoid today. Within Monday I'll probably be finished watching all of the seasons, which means that I'll have watched 60 episodes of TW in 15 days. I am easily obsessed with something, but the obsession easily dies. However, I realised not long ago, that as long as the obsession has been, it only needs a spark to be lightened. It'll be a relief when Monday comes, when I'm done watching all of it. Maybe then I can get my life back, ha. I guess it'll be in time for when the new One Direction tour starts this Saturday. Wow, that means the set list will be revealed in two days. Due to TW, I've barely been on Tumblr as of late, which is new development for me. It also means I've not been as up to date to things as I usually am. Can't say I'm really bothered about it, which is even more surprising. But I feel a lot like it's an evil circle, and sooner than not, I'm going to be watching videos and gif's of One Direction doing their thing on the new tour. Right now I have to go eat, then I'm going to watch the first episode of TW S4. 

my broken pieces, you pick them up

My attitude as of right now is: don't speak to me unless it's about Teen Wolf. In my head I've started using phrases like "you've got nothing on me mountain ash!" or "you're the mistletoe of my existence". Kiwi informed me last night, that S3 is actually split in two parts, and therefore has 24 episodes rather than 12. Basically it means that I'm not going to be finished with S3 by the end of this week. However, I did just finish watching S3 part one. I'm really surprised by how much I've enjoyed TW. Especially S3 part one: it's all well thought through, and there's a line from the first episode till' the end. I think that's what makes it so good, because there's a link through all of the episodes, which is just really impressive considering the amount of planning that would take. I am excited to watch part two, though Netflix doesn't have it. Ugh. And it's the only thing I want to watch on Netflix at the moment, so right now my subscription to Netflix is a total waste. My evaluation today went well. It's not like I thought it wouldn't, but you never know. I've heard the horror stories. My favourite part of the day was the lunch because today was my nurse supervisor's birthday. She brought along a load of different fruits which she had cut up. Along with some vanilla crème and quark. She's a healthy person, so she wanted to bring something that wasn't cake (though obviously you can make healthy cakes. It just takes a lot of effort and time, which I'm guessing she hadn't). It was delicious, and we all started singing a birthday song, to my supervisor's horror. In the end she shed a tear, and her face was completely red. It was a good moment, is all. I've got the day off tomorrow, and I'm going to watch Teen Wolf all day long, probably. I'm just not in the mood of doing anything productive. I feel like that's all I've been doing lately, so I deserve a proper break where I don't think about it. Right now I ought to get something to eat before it's too late for my digestive system. (Also, in case you haven't noticed, I've been obsessed with Sugar by Maroon 5 for the past few days. My obsession is evident by the amount of times I've used the lyrics as titles for my past blog posts'). 

you show me good loving, make it alright

It's dark outside when I wake up in the mornings. Far too dark for my liking. And my eyes always feel a bit like they want to be glued shut. And every day I wake up like that, my biggest wish is to just shut my eyes and fall asleep again. As it is, I'm (apparently) no longer a child who can ditch commitments (not that I've ever been like that). This week is hard because I've only got one day off, the rest of it I'm either at "praksis" or work. But I am looking forward to work, because it's at my previous "praksis", and I'm hoping that I'll see my old supervisors. I have my evaluation tomorrow, which always makes me nervous. Despite the fact that I'm sure it'll be fine, I still feel nervous. It's annoying, but I also don't think I'd want to change the feeling. I'm starting to feel excited for the Kodaline concert which is in just a bit over two weeks. But that also makes me nervous because it's close to the deadline for the theme of my bachelor. And that makes me think of the exam that I'm supposed to revise for as well. I'm just really looking forward until I'm done with this "praksis" and re-doing the exam. Then I can just focus on (mostly) one thing. I spent yesterday writing notes for the exam actually (yay, good on me), then watching Teen Wolf. I'm trying to get through S3 this week, and I'm probably going to watch a few episodes tonight. I discovered that I'm a definite yes-person to Derek Hale undressed. Maybe that's not surprising to you, but it was for me, because I usually have a thing for the underdogs. Which, I don't know why, but I do. And I don't really enjoy very prominent abs. I guess Derek Hale's are an exception. I have a feeling that once I'm done with S3, I'll carry onto S4. For now I've got to exercise, take a shower, prepare for my evaluation, then I might have time to watch Teen Wolf. I want to go to bed early tonight, but I also want to watch as many Teen Wolf episodes as possible. So there's a dilemma for me. What a though life, eh? 

you're hotter than a southern California day

noen ganger drømmer jeg om at du kommer og ringer på døra midt på natta. drømmer at klokken er 4:00 på natten, at sola snart skal stå opp. jeg åpner døren, og du smiler, strekker en hånd mot meg. "bli med," sier du. jeg tar hånden din og løper med deg ut til bilen, hvor vi hører på sangen vår og kjører til vi finner det vi lette etter. 

I just wanna be deep in your love, and it's killing me when you're away

Oh dear, Teen Wolf is definitely ruining my life at the moment. I'm just really happy there's only three seasons on Norwegian Netflix at the moment, because that means I only have one season left to get through before I can get back to my life. It's not like this is a surprise to me. I knew if before I started watching that I'd become so obsessed it would be hard for me to not watch. And I also knew before I started watching that I'd definitely develop some crush on Stiles. Things I was thinking yesterday: "wow, what a pretty face", "look at his lovely moles", "can you take your shirt off?", etc. I spent five hours at the mall with Marble and Kiwi yesterday. And one of the topics were Teen Wolf, as Kiwi teased me for my recent obsession. I had a revelation to myself, which is really explaining to me: I told them that I hate Allison and Scott because they're an obnoxious couple in love. Well, and their characters are honestly a bit boring. And then Kiwi and Marble started talking about Vampire Diaries, and I asked "is there a lot of romantic drama?" in which they answered yes. And like a light bulb flashed above my head, I realised that I don't like watching TV shows where there is a lot of "romantic drama". A movie is fine, I think, because it doesn't last as long, but TV shows I just can't handle. I can't tell you how many shows I've just stopped watching due to romantic drama repeating itself. I enjoy angst and mysteries. Obviously I enjoy a bit of romance, but there's a difference between romance, and repeating patterns in romance. Anyway, Kiwi ended up with a new phone, and I ended up with two new glasses. We were in a new favourite interior store of mine, and I was showing her the stand of HAY , and I spotted a glass that I thought was really pretty. Usually I have an inner monologue with myself, and most times I deny myself the happiness of buying loads of glasses and mugs. But instead of an inner monologue, and instead of denying myself new glasses, I said to myself: "it's okay, because I want it!". Kiwi stood beside me, apparently amused. I turned to her and said: "I know, I'm really weird," before she could say anything. She said something like "you're one of the most fascinating people I know". I am well aware that it's more normal to be buying clothes at my age, than collecting glasses and mugs. But I rarely care about being "normal", do I? In H&M I heard Change Your Ticket by One Direction, which really distracted me from the discussion Marble and I was having. Then later on I heard Teacher by Nick Jonas. So that's two of my favourites in one of my favourite stores, ha. We sat down at a cafe, which according to Kiwi and Marble is our "regular place", though we've only sat down at the place together once before. Due to no free seats, we were stood outside just waiting for someone to move. It was slightly awkward, but in the end we got a seat. Marble and I ended up with a big piece of chocolate cake each. I didn't manage to eat it all, but it was really good with a cup of tea. I got home around 5:20 pm, and I after dinner I watched Teen Wolf until I finally had to go to bed. I started watching the first episode of season 3, and it's a miracle I managed to stop. I'm supposed to spend today doing chores, cleaning and doing school work. But it's really tempting to watch another episode. And I probably am going to.