Throw your heart to me. Let it fall and hit the ground

It's been a weird day. I woke up two hours later than I had planned, went downstairs to make myself some brekkie. My mum was stood in the kitchen, preparing something, and I realised she used one of the vital ingredients I needed to make dinner. She did the same thing yesterday, so that was great. We had a bit of a discussion, mostly me sighing because she keeps doing it all the time. Around 11 am, Lynx sent me a message about mum travelling to her, and about a person dying. In my head it was the afternoon, but it was really only 11 am. This person who died, she hasn't been a big part of my life, only a minor puzzle piece. But I couldn't help but feel really sad, sad for the family that's mourning her now, sad for all the people who are affected. I've got a picture of her in one of my albums, actually. I was dragged with to the airport today, and my dad tried to lure me into driving. We're both stubborn-- he won't give up, and I won't drive. I didn't drive, luckily, because I've not driven a car since last year. At least I think so. But we had a big discussion, talked more with him than I've done in ages. He cracked a smile, and I looked at him, amused. I'm currently working on my thesis. Forever doing that, it seems. I feel a bit like I'm working myself into an overdrive, like I'm about to explode sometime soon. I think maybe I'm doing it on purpose too, one last hurrah. It's like I'm channelling all my insecurities and nerves and thoughts into it, and well, I'll see how I survive. I am glad though, because my creative side has seemed to want to step into the light again, and I get the urge to draw small insignificant doodles. But it's good, better, I can focus on something and not think about all the other things that awaits me. One week left now, then I don't have to worry about my thesis any more. There will be other things to worry about, because that is apparently how life works. But I'm trying to find a balance of thinking about things and not thinking about things. If anyone has the answer, I'd like to know.